Faye Ann Cooper - My Mother - The Doctors Told Her Mother She Might Never Walk Again

This was written by my mother, Faye Ann Cooper Rosenberg about her experience of being crippled when she was a child.  

"When I was in the 5^th grade, I was a typical fun loving little girl.  I took tap dancing, piano lessons, loved to sing, and just loved life.  My teacher was John S. Crosby, and I remember he wrote on my report card, “Fae Ann is doing very well in school, she could talk a little less and not hurt our class any.”  So I guess I loved to talk, as most little girls do.

As the year progressed, I developed a slight limp, Mother was concerned about it because my older brother, Jim had “Perthese Disease,” a hip disorder.  She took me to the local Dr. Haymond, and he said he thought I needed my tonsils out, so after school was out, I think this was the spring of 1942, they took them out, also at this time the doctor X-rayed my hips and he confirmed that I had Perthese like my brother.  He told Mother to keep me off my feet for 6 months.  This disturbed us very much because it meant I would have to discontinue dancing and curtailing all other activities as well as not being able to start to the 6^th grade that fall.  I had so looked forward to being a big 6^th grader, but this would not be.

Mother was so very patient and kind to me.  She got all the necessary materials from the school and was to be my tutor.  Mom had taught school in Hatch Town, before she was married, so this experience would help her very much in teaching me.

As I look back on those days, I can remember a very tender, and loving and concerned mother who gave her very all to me, both in love and in teaching.  Not only did Mom teach me my school lessons, she also taught me how to sew, how to read music, how to chord on the piano, how to sing alto, she was my teacher and also my very best friend.  Is it any wonder why I love and cherish her memory so very much?

After spending 6 months off my feet, (I couldn’t even hop on one leg, because they said my hip needed constant rest) the doctor X-rayed my hip again and found it wasn’t any better.  So they decided to put my leg in traction for 6 weeks.  They raised the foot of my bed 12 inches higher than my head and put 10 pounds of weight on my leg thus pulling the hip socket out, so it would give the bone a chance to heal.  This was very hard on me, and I know now how it must have been heart breaking to my mother.

I had a sister Mae who was 5 years older than me, and she was so very sweet and kind to me.  We were the very best of friends, then and always since.  I got so I wouldn’t eat anything but macaroni and tomato juice, and if anyone would ask what they could bring to me, I would always say, “Nibbs.”  I just loved those licorice candies.

After the 6 weeks were up and there was no progress in my condition, they decided to let me get up on crutches.  So they had Mother get my one shoe with a-inch lift on it, so my bad leg would not touch the floor, thus enabling me to hold it up easier.  I was able to go back to school now that I was on crutches.

It was winter time and my brothers were working in California in the ship yards, because the war was on.  They thought it would help me if Mom, Mae and I went down there.  I attended school there in Harbor City and we stayed there about 3 months.  I believe Grant was drafted in the Army.  The warmer climate had not helped my condition any, it seemed.

Mother had heard of a Crippled Children’s Clinic in Salt Lake City, so after pondering it in her heart and discussing it with Dad, they decided I should go to see specialists in the city.  The doctor I went to was Dr. Tyree.  He was very kind and nice to me.  I just loved him.  He carefully examined me and came to the conclusion I should be put in a cast.  So, the next morning Mom took me to the LDS Hospital and they put a cast on from underneath my arms to the tip of my one toe, on the one leg.  It had to dry overnight, so I had to stay in the hospital.  I didn’t sleep a wink I was so scared, and also worried about poor Mom alone in the Wilson Hotel.

I remember the two doctors that put the cast on said it was a very bad case of Perthese.  I didn’t tell Mom they said that, I didn’t want to worry her.  It was hard getting used to this heavy cast, and I found that I got very tired easily.  I had it on for 6 months, then they X-rayed it again and put a shorter one on from my knee, to my underarms.  I had this on for 3 months.  I will never forget how hot it got and itchy too.  I hated having it on.  I always wore pants to cover it up.

I was now in the 7^th grade at school and Ellis Crosby was my teacher.  He did all he could to help me catch up with the class.  I remember that there was a couple of women who went to the School Board and thought I shouldn’t be allowed to be promoted, since I hadn’t attended school that much.  So, Mr. Crosby gave our class a big math examination consisting of all phases of math, fractions, decimals included, and I passed one of the highest in the class.  I had had a very good tutor.  My mom.  I didn’t know they were testing all the class to find out where I stood, I would have probably really been scared if I had known.  Anyway, they didn’t have any more to say about whether I should be promoted or not.

My sister and brother-in-law, Gwen and Lynn Davis, moved out of town, and they suggested to Mother that she, Mae and I move into their home on Main Street so I could ride the school bus to school each day.  This worked out just great because, otherwise, I may not have been able to attend school because we lived quite a distance from the school, and we didn’t have a car.  By the time I got my cast off, they moved back to Panguitch, so we went back home to live, but every morning either Gwen or Lynn would pick me up and take me to and from school.  They also saw to it that I went to movies and other types of entertainment.  I shall be forever grateful to both of them.

We went back to Salt Lake to the clinic to get the cast off after having it on for 9 months, and they X-rayed me again and called Mother in by herself for a progress report.  They told Mother that I would never walk again.  Can you imagine how very terrible she must have felt?  They had assured her all along that I would be as good as new someday.  Now this bad news.  She didn’t tell me this for quite some time.  She knew how it would upset me.  They told her to take me home and have me start putting weight on my leg.  My poor little leg was so shriveled up I just wondered if it would ever return to normal.  I just can’t even imagine how very troubled my mother must have been knowing that I was never to walk again.  Of course, she and I were alone in Salt Lake.  Dad was at the sheep herd most of the time.

I’m sure Mom felt desperate with knowing I would never walk again and live a normal life, but she never gave up.  She had me have a Patriarchal Blessing and sent my name to all of the temples, and of course she fasted and prayed on my behalf.  I remember that it was October 10^th when they told me to start putting weight on my leg.  This was harder than I thought it would be.

I was in the 8^th grade now and friends were beginning to go to dances and parties.  I really felt cheated, now more than before, because I had looked forward to being a teenage and doing these things.  I finally decided I would walk on one crutch, and eventually I went to the dance.  This was really hard on me to watch the kids all having fun and me sitting there with my crutch under the bench yearning to join in on the fun.  Everyone else having fun, and me crippled.  I cried many times about my misfortune.

Oh how I hated it when people would stare at me and wonder what was wrong with me.  I got so upset a couple of times that I even hit a little kid with my crutch because they were staring.  I didn’t like being different and being stared at.  I just wanted to be like the rest of my friends.  Why did this have to happen to me?

I began singing duets with a good friend of mine, Doris Walker.  She was the best friend a girl could ever have.  She was always so sweet and gentle to me.  It was hard on me to get up in front of an audience on crutches, but Mom encouraged me to do it, and I am glad now that I did because it helped me to have a little self- confidence, though not much at this time.

I’ll never forget one night I was at a dance and I just knew I could dance if I had my arm on my partner’s waist to balance me.  One of my friends who had always been very kind to me, came up and asked me if I would like to dance.  It was Glen Owens.  I put my crutch under the bench, and got up and he helped me on the dance floor.  I was scared but never had been more excited.  I found I could dance once more.  I’ll never forget Glen for helping me find the courage to try again.  From then on, boys would ask me to dance, and after the dance I would get on my old crutch and go home.

It seems that I just gradually got so I could walk without my crutch.  I seemed to get around better all the time.  Before too long, I was actually walking like everyone else.  My mother’s faith and prayers had worked.

A few months after that we had an appointment in Salt Lake again at the clinic.  They saw that I didn’t have a crutch and asked me to walk across the floor.  They were totally amazed.  This was the little girl who would never walk again!  They told Mother they didn’t know what had happened, but it was out of their hands.  She knew what had happened.  A miracle had been performed.

I went on to finish high school, winning many honors.  I sang in the All State Chorus twice at BYU and once at the Tabernacle in Salt Lake.  I sang in all of the music competitions in our area many times, and played in the band.  I played the trumpet.  When I was in the 9th grade, I was voted Harvest Ball Queen, the youngest contestant running.  I was Co-Editor of the Yearbook, Vice President of the Student Body, and elected to run on both and blue and the white parties as queen of the Graduation Ball.  I felt very honored to be chosen to run on both tickets.  Jed Henrie won as king. What a big thrill and honor this was for me, and the biggest thrill was that I was now living a normal life once more.

I graduated from Panguitch High School in 1949 and sang a duet with Jean Moore, another of my good friends.  We sang, "Our Yesterdays."  Dad was there and heard me sing for the first time in public.  I was so happy.  

Now as I look back over my life as a child and young teenager, I remember how hard these things were for me to bear.  But I was not alone.  Whatever kind of person I am, or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.  She was always at my side, giving me courage to carry on, no matter how hard it got at times.

I feel that if I had to be disabled, probably that was the best time in my life for it to happen.  I was old enough to face it even though I was only 10 1/2 years old.

I am so thankful for the precious moments I spent with Mom.  I know this helped me to be a more caring, thoughtful individual.  I only hope and pray that I am the kind of daughter she would want me to be.  I know I have tried, I never wanted to hurt her in any way, I loved her so very much.

I owe much love and thanks to my dear sisters and brothers, as well as my dear mom and dad.  I always knew they all loved me very much and would do all in their power to make me happy.

I have had a wonderful life, being married and the mother of three wonderful children. Though we lost our oldest son in an automobile accident, this was another heart-breaking chapter in my life.  We also have adorable grand children.  I am indeed thankful to God for allowing me so many pleasures and blessings in life, even though there were many bad times for me in my younger years.  Most of all, I am grateful to God for giving me two wonderful parents, and brothers and sisters, and for everything in my life, especially my dear children and little grandchildren, and son and daughter-in-law, and of course, my wonderful husband.  For all of these blessings, I am most thankful."